I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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