Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
