Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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