Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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