My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I need to align my fucking chakras
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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