i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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