Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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