I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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