Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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