R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
