How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
