I feel great
I just peed on a car
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
