What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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