im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
