I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
