Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
