But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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