what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
