were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I looked at my own cervix.
My cat gives me a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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