She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
