i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Randomize
