my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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