she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
MIDGETS
????
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
this is an emotional support booty call
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
