and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
