how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
You took a bar mat shot.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize