why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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