no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
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