Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
