they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
