We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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