How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
