Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
