woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
