he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
We have so much sex to catch up on
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
