I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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