She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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