Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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