Will you blow on my dice?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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