Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
