rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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