Duck Duck Cougar?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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