JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
