YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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