Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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