Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
