Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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