we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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