never play flip cup with pint glasses
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
