R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize