It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I want to fling myself into the sun
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
