why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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